The Case of the Missing Oreos

It was the best of snacks. It was the worst of snacks.

Once upon a time, a good fairy bestowed upon her staff some delightful manna-from-heaven treats – chocolate-covered Oreos from a gourmet chocolatier.

They looked delightful. From what I heard, they were exquisite. I was exhibiting extreme and uncharacteristic willpower and stayed away and consumed none. And, unwittingly unplanned, so did another person, although not because of willpower. Little did we know at the time, these innocent little sugary concoctions would become the source of ongoing strife and enmity, a bone of contention and discord.

The consumption of these Oreos provoked the question – is it okay to eat the very last of something?

The party of the first part alleges that it’s never okay to eat the very last item without explicit consent from the other stakeholders.

The party of the second part believes that there is a statute of limitations on last-item-consumption.

You can probably see how this situation evolved and how these burning questions came to light. It was not a good ending to a Thursday afternoon, at least not for the first person (the person who ended up Oreo-less). And somehow, I got myself into the middle of this situation because I:

1) Did not clarify the allocation of the Oreos with Person #1
2) Offered misguided generosity to Person #2
3) Did not discuss previously mentioned Oreo allotments with Person #2
4) Did not slap the cookie away mid-bite from the mouth of the consumer of the last two cookies.

Horrifying. I should lose all snack distribution privileges.

And, in regard to #4, just have to say that would have been impossible. Slapping people in almost any situation is frowned upon (except during football games, at which point it is totally normal) and smacking people mid-bite at work is probably even more inappropriate. But there’s only so much one can do in this type of situation, and then, friendships and destroyed and massive levels of resentment build up and, well, that’s just the way the cookie crumbles. Or crunches. Whatever.

So, peeps, what’s the verdict in the Case of the Cookies? Okay to eat or completely out-of-bounds?


3 thoughts on “The Case of the Missing Oreos

Add yours

  1. Juror #1 finds in favor of the defendant. The very last of things may be expressly reserved by creating and entering into a verbal contract, however no such contract existed here. It is the plaintiff’s right to feel disappointed, however the blame rests squarely on his/her own shoulders. Cookies and other wonderful things are meant to be eaten right then. The plaintiff should reflect on this as a life lesson and never put off the eating of contractually unprotected cookies again.


  2. so if there is delicious looking food sitting on someone’s desk, anyone can just come by and eat the food? I am never going to leave food on my desk if this is how people think! You ask if you can have some and if the answer is yes you take a bite/piece, you never take the last of anything as the person offering was just being polite and of course wants the last of THEIR OWN TREAT! duh. common courtesy and sense, people. And slapping food out of someone’s hand is highly recommended to save the “last chocolate covered oreo”!! 🙂


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