You know how some families have different special holiday traditions, like the Elf on a Shelf or leaving our cookies for a big, jolly guy or maybe finding eggs and receiving baskets filled with treats?

Well, in our family, we didn’t do those things, so we came up with a new tradition: re-reading the following letter written by my little sister at around 6 or 7. It supersedes all those things and just might be the best, most hilariously disturbing holiday “essay” of all time. Because it’s amazing.


But wait – it gets better.


Please consider your day made, and try to have a Merry Christmas, even though you’ve just seen Santa and his friends crushed under an anvil (I asked. I thought it was a giant shoe or a horse’s hoof, but no. It’s an anvil).